Your name:
Brenda
Four words:
Bosom
Big
Brain
Band
State/country:
Belgium
Boy Name:
Brandon
Girl Name:
Betty
Occupation:
Bum
Something you can wear:
Boots
Something found in a kitchen:
Bottle
Something you shout:
Bodoh!
Something you do at school:
Bestow knowledge
Name of an animal:
Bear
Name of a Drink:
Banana milkshake
Name a Hoilday:
Best day?
Name a body part:
BREASTS
- Mood:
artistic
..................
I came back on Tuesday night and til now, my suitcase is still open on the floor. Contents look ransacked, but still relatively untouched.
Btw, Swiss Air is good. I like...... The in-flight entertainment system was awesome. Maybe not, but its been ages that I've been on such an
The trip was great, albeit short. I ate and shopped. Then i ate. Afterwhich i ate somemore. In those 4.5 days, the word 'hungry' was totally erased from my dictionary. Shiok.
....................
Back to reality. Its hard to eat anything or have much of an appetite when u're stuch with ur serving of Value Combo #1.
- Mood:
mellow
Everyone is stronger than they know, they just forget to believe in it sometimes.
People with the best intentions don't always set the best examples. I learnt this through often depressing situations in my family. My mum has been setting the best of examples for me in those aspects that really matter in life.
****************************************
I'm falling sick! not now please....
- Mood:
bored
Time to catch up with House. I love the sarcastic lame (literally) doctor!
One more day to our 4th anniversary.. So very very excited. Hehe....
Unexpected event towards the end of the day.
I was touched, I teared. The kind of tears that I haven't shown in a long time. Simultaneously confused and dazed in a good/bad way. But it started a whole train of thought and the answer gets clearer and clearer as time passes.
Despite everything, I'm glad to finally be home.
Man Utd lost. With just barely 3 minutes to go. Ultra disappointed.
- Mood:
tired
Lots of things to mark today.. I rarely give my students homework, but when i do, i got alot of things to mark.. haha.. Music lesson was hell.. as usual. Wad's new..
Time to start planning for my trip at the end of May.. Gonna watch Spiderman soon, so exciting!! Practicum ending soon, so... I feel nothing.. Just relieved ba.. Kinda fell into the pathetic cycle of work that I'm used to it liao.. Nevertheless, the time has finally come.. Hmmm, but he's not there liao.. Oh shit there i go again.. Pardon me my friends..
Going to check out ticket prices on Monday.. =)
- Mood:
listless
- Mood:
gloomy
And you believe that's all you've got - your hands and a loosely sheltered insecurity. You overlook the sturdiness of the shelter, the bruised soldier clutching tightly onto a gun, his eyes tightly transfixed onto the door.
But at the end of the day, you know that you're safe here. You know that by hiding here, you won't find yourself standing in the line of a crossfire. You know you wouldn't have to duck, or dodge. You know no one's going to be throwing a grenade at you. You know.
You know only because you believe. You believe only because you're sick and tired of being cynical. Because being cynical is the only defence you have between you and the disturbing reality of reality. Only by scoffing at physically impaired children, then you'd ease the pain of having to sympathize. Maybe not ease, but remove. You remove the pain, like it doesn't belong to you.
Being cynical allows a thorough assessment of every crappy situation you find yourself in, the do's and don'ts, the wrong and the right. You measure every criteria, index every index. You're afraid you'd find yourself in a position where you'd have to regret, so you avoid it like a disease. But the truth is, no one granted us superhuman foresight. We can't be in the know of everything before, now, and years later. We aren't capable of predicting, and sometimes even our instincts fail us.
So we have to rely on ourselves, on our better judgement. We enforce that better judgement, and if we're still flawed - at least we'd be able to tell ourselves that we've exhausted every possibilities and it was our best.
- Mood:
blank
didn't sleep much last night, my eyes are puffy and i have body aches.. I had a dream of 'us', hell of a painful experience.. started to tear the moment I woke up.. I miss him... so much so that I didn't go to work today..
At the end of the day, I have my single life back.. so how come i dun feel the least bit happy? I have banished thoughts of patching back from my mind right now.. As much as it hurts, it is not possible after everything that has happened. Starting to wonder whether the good times were real.. 2.5 years of it can't seem to fight off the 0.5 years of bad times. Makes me even more determined to just move on... Yah, it might just be the sadness talking right now, but I myself already had it in mind should it come to this. If you really love someone and want him to be better off, you have to let him go.. I've reached the point where I'm willing to sacrifice my own desires for him... Take it as repentence for whatever wrong I did.. I bear the consequences, willingly..
This whole experience is enough.. I do not, and cannot, go through it again.. Whatever faith left of the person that he is, is gone.. But I have renewed faith in myself and the things that I am able to give.. So let me walk out of all this a stronger woman.. Unlike you, i will never treat you as a best friend. Just a friend. Even then... you are but a memory.. Your blog used to say "don't let go", but was that period ever real? I'm letting go completely...
- Mood:
crushed
This school's assembly is so freaking boring.. i guess boring-ness is infectious. No wonder most people here look like they're from the set of House of Horrors. Kero had his 3rd jab.. didn't cry at all. Not a hum husky afterall.. But he really reeks now.. Not supposed to bathe him for 1 week. oh boy....... maybe buy those automatic air-fresheners that "pffftttt..!" every 5 minutes and strap it to his back.. Cos when he runs past us now, its like the garbage truck is here.
Btw, i watched tv for like the 1st time in a week last night.. Fann Wong is so pretty! hahaha but she aged alot.. Long time (and i mean really long time) never watch Ch 8 serials.. Once in a blue moon, its quite nostalgic. haha... no lah, i think Fann Wong is eye candy enough..
Whew really glad that its friday... My body is suffering. Once again i'm looking forward to sleeping in. And looking forward to going out with my boy tonight.. Think we're gonna watch TNMT. i lurrrvved them as a kid!! my favourite was Michaelangelo... So stupid rite, 4 giant turtles saving the world. hahaha.. but I like.... They look damn cute in the cartoons. Can't wait to catch the movie.
- Location:staff room
- Mood:
sick
When a man loves a woman
Can't keep his mind on nothin' else
He'd trade the world
For a good thing he's found
If she is bad, he can't see it
She can do no wrong
Turn his back on his best friend
If he puts her down
When a man loves a woman
Spend his very last dime
Trying to hold on to what he needs
He'd give up all his comforts
And sleep out in the rain
If she said that's the way It ought to be
When a man loves a woman
I give you everything I've got (yeah)
Trying to hold on
To your precious love
Baby please don't treat me bad
When a man loves a woman
Deep down in his soul
She can bring him such misery
If she is playing him for a fool
He's the last one to know
Loving eyes can never see
Yes when a man loves a woman
I know exactly how he feels
'Cause baby, baby, baby I am a man
When a man loves a woman
Came across this song just now.. Used to love its melodious-ness and all.. But listening to the lyrics just can't help but think "zun bo?". Especially bout the part on turning his back on his best friend.. Males love to wayang on and on about loyalty and being a brother to their friends lor.. Think it actually takes up quite a bit of their ego.. To forego (for ego) this would be a crime punishable by death.. haha.. Yes, its me with the boobs talking. I'm allowed to make such exaggerated (or maybe not) comments.. bottomline is, if such a guy exists, he is either really really in love, or he's just a wuss...
- Mood:
thoughtful
Gonna start teaching this Thursday liao.. Time to start doing lesson plan. Yech..Today is not a good day. Observation officially starts in Term 2. Quite scary eh.. Work is fast and furious. Get down to business now..
Happy Monniversary Darling!!! Muackz!! Super look forward to seeing you and Kero later.. Kero is making great progress btw, learn how to not pee and shit in the house liao.. Hope his cough gets better. =X
- Mood:
crazy
School sports day tmr. Mother nature better hold it in. Don't even know my duties for tmr man.. Hope they don't allocate me to be in-charge of refreshments or stand in front of the milo truck and be in-charge of discipline or anything like that.. I wanna be out there doing something directly related to the theme of 'sports'. Wah if they had teachers race and the prize was free unlimited supply of printing paper and markers, I confirm go take part. Such a 'solid' prize in these laosai times, I think can motivate me to break all my past sprint records. diedie oso must win.. haha suddenly reminds me of my jc days, when i was being sabo-ed on my birthday(friend was threatening to dump a load of flour and eggs on me)during netball training, I ran so freaking fast that my teacher-in-charge couldn't believe it.. crouching tiger hidden dragon k.. But i need this kinda boliao external motivating factor lah. Boliaoness should be my middle name. Then my initials can be BBC. The totally uncut uncouth version. Hurhur...
sorry, sharp turn ahead. I got mahjong craving.. red chong, peh ban, fat choy. Peng! (daydreaming.. shiokness..)
This blog is damn value-minus. But i lurvveee.. Oh! Must thank my lovely for taking time out and travelling all the way just to have dinner with me.. Muackz! I love these moments that make me forget that we've already been together for 3+ years.. He makes my heart flutter so. Seems like it was just yesterday that we got together..
- Mood:
chipper
I'm just a small tiny negligible being. Say and vent also wrong, keep it in also wrong.. slowly but surely, i'm losing my grip.. bloody stab me.. ranting on my blog is good. Yeah my blog offers me no words of motivation, but it also doesn't put me down and make me feel like I committed a felony just cos I have certain feelings..
- Mood:
confused
- Mood: gloomy
Went Jade Room for my reunion dinner. Tiny affair with just my family and my uncle, auntie, and cousin.. My family is like how small. Dad's side doesn't count cos they're all in Malaysia and I really wouldn't be able to recognise most of them even if they were kill my rabbit in my face.. Anyways, dinner was awesome. All the new year packages are standard and they're catered for 10pax. So the 6 of us actually ate the share of 4 other people. As usual, I ate the most. (wad like 5 bowls of ee-mee?) haha i'm really freaking greedy. I have a pig (big) appetite. Super full now.
Played cards with my parents. haha it was damn fun! My mum is suuuuuuppppperrrrrr slow in learning gambling rules! Dad aka gambling god, won the most. There exists a strategy to place your bets in order to attain economic growth in the long run. A pity I still haven't quite got the skill and luck to master it. Yet. Mahjong session tmr.. Pls oh pls lemme win big big! I treat it as my part-time job.. I'm a very conscientious, dedicated, loyal worker.. Grant me some bonus pls. Last month finances in the red liao, must make my life worthwhile during new year..
Something cute to mention. My baobei willingly travelled from home to my place just to c me for like half hour twice today. Despite being busy with new year stuff and all, he still makes the effort just cos he wants to see me.. haha i think its so sweet. Seriously, everyday is just valentine's day for us.. dat's the reason y i cherish this r/s so much. =) After a couple of rough patches, I'm glad we're still the way we are.
Hongying, Happy Birthday!!!! Double happiness for you.. New year + birthday.. Red packets should be all 'upsized' ones yah.. haha.
- Mood:
pleased
Now i gotta add on to my part for project, which is due tmr.. Sianz. Chop chop finish so that I can go rest.. Half asleep liao lah.
- Location:desk
- Mood: happy
.......
super duper emotionally drained after yesterday lah.. This is just one of those weeks in NIE where I just hope to survive it.. (it really ain't about your friends, if u really understood u'd stop feeling this way. I would appreciate some understanding above all else. cos the bottomline is: I need your strength)
On another note, my thumbdrive just exploded.. with information. No more space!! Not now man.. I'm thinking of getting a new laptop. But. BUT. show me the money!!! Just wait and see how much ang pao money I collect this year first.. Can't wait for CNY. Cos after that can go collect Kasper.. Pls bless the little darling. Hunter's doing fine now, it was really great to see him just bounding about with energy yet I felt guilty for picking Kasper over him. After all, Hunter was the cute little furball that we fell in love with in the first place..
If the resposibility were mine, perhaps i would bring you home in the end.
- Mood: drained
I hate doing this essay now when my brain is threatening to just crash on me and send me into lala land.. oooohhhh.. i wanna go LaLA LAND!!! If you dunno what lala land means, lemme explain---I am tired and wanna sleep. Feeling miserable.. Aaarrghhh. Gotta tap into my inner chi by myself.. Not like I have a choice to not hand it in tmr and not have to face the music.
The stress is getting to me. Really. .......Tired....
*sigh*
- Mood: depressed
- Music:TV noise
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